Is Anybody Listening?

many talk but few listen

What If I Listened More…?

Posted on | July 12, 2012 | No Comments

This is a big one – because it strikes deep at who I am….

Not long after getting married I noted that my wife said very little – and I was doing all the talking. So I asked her why…

Her reply was very blunt: “What’s the point, because you never listen anyhow…?” Ouch! That hit hard – but it has never been forgotten.

Part of my difficulty was that I had lived on my own for the past few years and so had no one to talk to. Now, at last, I had an audience right on hand…

Even today I struggle to be a good listener. My wife tells me she notices when she has lost my attention because I develop that far-away look… My mind has taken off in a new direction triggered by what I have heard. This is the downside of having a fertile mind…!

But when I listen more there are some clear benefits… Let’s list some of the ones that stand out:

  • Other people feel they are important and have something to say
  • I learn more
  • I also benefit from their input
  • My perspectives are modified and enriched by what I have heard – even though it may not be what I was looking for
  • We move forward together with a more balanced and complete understanding
  • I earn greater respect in the process
  • Our relationship is strengthened

Can’t be bad! Then why is it so difficult?


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